Yea...I'm slipping this bit about sex in between a string of posts about my Aitkaf experience precisely because I wanna convey one message.
It's not that dirty, folks.
Now I can understand why premarital and adulterated -- excuse the pun and the horrible horrible slaughter of grammar -- sex is outlawed in Islam, but let's talk about it, shall we? Let's be open and fair and prod this creature called taboo right in its hiny, see what we can make of it!
So what about sex, you ask, a bit shakily, a bit nervous. I close my eyes and groan.
'Cuz you know, buddy. You do, and yet you pretend ignorance.
Sex is important from a human POV. It's healthy (as long as you keep yer damned fetishes to yerself!), it's a stress reliever, and it's important for conception...but most of all, it's a part of you. Like eating and pooping...
Our society is male-dominated, no question about it. So is our Western counterpart, although the majority of their populace doesn't know it yet. But more importantly, ours has religious bounds and restrictions that theirs doesn't. We have a concept called Zana and its appropriate punishment. They did too -- adultery is mentioned in the bible and the punishment is death, I believe -- but we have one tiny hitch that most mullahs fail to mention or take strong note of.
The punishment for Zana, according to Islamic Law, is applicable only if there are 4 witnesses present who can testify as to the actual occurence of the intercourse right before their eyes.
Do you see? Or shall I pick up a stick and shove it through your ears, mobilise that pudding for a brain that you have?Who on earth would be stupid enough to have sex with another person in front of four other people, who are all at the best (for them) concealed in shadows or at the worst, enjoying the scenery at an orgy? Who would be idiotic or foolhardy enough for that, tell me?
My point is God cares about the Laws he has given us, but more important than those are the principles and the reasons behind those? If somebody's commited an Islamic felony that is personal, limited perhaps only to himself or another willing party , God would rather deal with that person Himself on the Day of Reckoning rather than give human beings power to enact their own stupid grudges and prejudices. We are frail, jealous, vengeful creatures. A Mullah with a senseless and hard heart would gloat while ordering an execution for Zanah when most of us know that he would have loved to be in the adulterer's position had society and his rep. and his own religious cowardice not been present. I'm not generalising but rather putting out a thought.
And for any would-be adulterers who believe in free sex out there, reading my blog: I'm not endorsing free sex. I do not take the responsibility of your actions or beliefs. I do not confirm or deny any suspicions or doubts you might have had about the permissibility of premarital sex. My beliefs are my own and they will remain so. Hell, some of them are not even beliefs but rather conveniences and bits of agnosticism. But I'm trying to be honst with myself, and so here I go.
I believe personally that God judges men very kindly. That would mean that in the best possible scenario (or the most convenient, depending on your POV), God would not punish me for making love to a woman that I really care about and have full intentions of being with for the rest of my life. Note I say, make love, not fuck. The two words are very different and, for me, they have very different implications...
but even so, allow me to tell you what, I believe, will happen to our society once I put this belief into practice.
I have sex. I tell a friend about it, or she does. In either case, my friends are also young and horny. Some have girls, others don't. And each of them is different from me and my woman. So what starts is a domino fall. Men and women have sex. Vigilantly, privately. Both partners always afraid somebody will find out and blame them. At first, they have feelings for each other. But eventually, that goes away. Free sex, a result of horniness, nothing more, enters. Then there forms a group of 'in' people who scoff at the traditionalists, who switch partners all the time, who think free sex is liberal and classy. By now all fear has evaporated for the group has grown in size and they can tackle society and its condemnations. So basically we become what the Paki Middle and Upper Class society has in reality become in the last twenty years.
Now come the side effects. For of course religion's primary goal is the maintainence of a stable society. We begin to get reports of unintentional pregnancies, , simple abortions, fatal abortions, venereal diseases, date-rapes, and all the issues you are so familiar with. In the long run, the divorce rate escalates for of course once you're done with the religious morals, only human morality remains, which fluctuates, depending on our moods and circumstances. Dissatisfaction because of the casualities and ironies of your dreams versus reality arises, and you don't have religious values or niches to bury your heads in.
Ultimately total chaos in your relationships. Kinda like present day West!
That is why, I think, religion is there. To protect us from ourselves. And that is why I'm strongly against free sex. For it will bind us more rather than freeing us.
Now, about solutions, or shall we say, a balance between the two extremes:I haven't found any. I don't really think there can be anything that justify free sex in religion. The shariat has made it abundantly clear. Thus follow the Islamic injunctions about getting kids to marry early, thus avoiding sin and decadence. But in present day Paki society, I think that won't work either, because of multiple social issus that I won't delve into now.
So what's the answer?
I guess the answer will come with time. Currently we're going through a transitory phase, where two extremes, Un-understood or fanatically implemented Islamic values and born-out-of-rebellion or a herd-mentality Westernism, are clashing wildly. Hopefully, something good will be born out of this tussle.But that time alone will decide...
It's not that dirty, folks.
Now I can understand why premarital and adulterated -- excuse the pun and the horrible horrible slaughter of grammar -- sex is outlawed in Islam, but let's talk about it, shall we? Let's be open and fair and prod this creature called taboo right in its hiny, see what we can make of it!
So what about sex, you ask, a bit shakily, a bit nervous. I close my eyes and groan.
'Cuz you know, buddy. You do, and yet you pretend ignorance.
Sex is important from a human POV. It's healthy (as long as you keep yer damned fetishes to yerself!), it's a stress reliever, and it's important for conception...but most of all, it's a part of you. Like eating and pooping...
Our society is male-dominated, no question about it. So is our Western counterpart, although the majority of their populace doesn't know it yet. But more importantly, ours has religious bounds and restrictions that theirs doesn't. We have a concept called Zana and its appropriate punishment. They did too -- adultery is mentioned in the bible and the punishment is death, I believe -- but we have one tiny hitch that most mullahs fail to mention or take strong note of.
The punishment for Zana, according to Islamic Law, is applicable only if there are 4 witnesses present who can testify as to the actual occurence of the intercourse right before their eyes.
Do you see? Or shall I pick up a stick and shove it through your ears, mobilise that pudding for a brain that you have?Who on earth would be stupid enough to have sex with another person in front of four other people, who are all at the best (for them) concealed in shadows or at the worst, enjoying the scenery at an orgy? Who would be idiotic or foolhardy enough for that, tell me?
My point is God cares about the Laws he has given us, but more important than those are the principles and the reasons behind those? If somebody's commited an Islamic felony that is personal, limited perhaps only to himself or another willing party , God would rather deal with that person Himself on the Day of Reckoning rather than give human beings power to enact their own stupid grudges and prejudices. We are frail, jealous, vengeful creatures. A Mullah with a senseless and hard heart would gloat while ordering an execution for Zanah when most of us know that he would have loved to be in the adulterer's position had society and his rep. and his own religious cowardice not been present. I'm not generalising but rather putting out a thought.
And for any would-be adulterers who believe in free sex out there, reading my blog: I'm not endorsing free sex. I do not take the responsibility of your actions or beliefs. I do not confirm or deny any suspicions or doubts you might have had about the permissibility of premarital sex. My beliefs are my own and they will remain so. Hell, some of them are not even beliefs but rather conveniences and bits of agnosticism. But I'm trying to be honst with myself, and so here I go.
I believe personally that God judges men very kindly. That would mean that in the best possible scenario (or the most convenient, depending on your POV), God would not punish me for making love to a woman that I really care about and have full intentions of being with for the rest of my life. Note I say, make love, not fuck. The two words are very different and, for me, they have very different implications...
but even so, allow me to tell you what, I believe, will happen to our society once I put this belief into practice.
I have sex. I tell a friend about it, or she does. In either case, my friends are also young and horny. Some have girls, others don't. And each of them is different from me and my woman. So what starts is a domino fall. Men and women have sex. Vigilantly, privately. Both partners always afraid somebody will find out and blame them. At first, they have feelings for each other. But eventually, that goes away. Free sex, a result of horniness, nothing more, enters. Then there forms a group of 'in' people who scoff at the traditionalists, who switch partners all the time, who think free sex is liberal and classy. By now all fear has evaporated for the group has grown in size and they can tackle society and its condemnations. So basically we become what the Paki Middle and Upper Class society has in reality become in the last twenty years.
Now come the side effects. For of course religion's primary goal is the maintainence of a stable society. We begin to get reports of unintentional pregnancies, , simple abortions, fatal abortions, venereal diseases, date-rapes, and all the issues you are so familiar with. In the long run, the divorce rate escalates for of course once you're done with the religious morals, only human morality remains, which fluctuates, depending on our moods and circumstances. Dissatisfaction because of the casualities and ironies of your dreams versus reality arises, and you don't have religious values or niches to bury your heads in.
Ultimately total chaos in your relationships. Kinda like present day West!
That is why, I think, religion is there. To protect us from ourselves. And that is why I'm strongly against free sex. For it will bind us more rather than freeing us.
Now, about solutions, or shall we say, a balance between the two extremes:I haven't found any. I don't really think there can be anything that justify free sex in religion. The shariat has made it abundantly clear. Thus follow the Islamic injunctions about getting kids to marry early, thus avoiding sin and decadence. But in present day Paki society, I think that won't work either, because of multiple social issus that I won't delve into now.
So what's the answer?
I guess the answer will come with time. Currently we're going through a transitory phase, where two extremes, Un-understood or fanatically implemented Islamic values and born-out-of-rebellion or a herd-mentality Westernism, are clashing wildly. Hopefully, something good will be born out of this tussle.But that time alone will decide...
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